Dealing with the Loss of Motivation and Burnout

Recently, I graduated from Tufts University and ended my college tennis career. My team and I lost in the semifinals of the NCAA Tournament, the most important tournament of the year, and that was my last chance to win a national title for my school and for my team.

It was devastating. The next morning, when I woke up, I fully realized the extent of what had just happened. It meant that I would never have another opportunity to win a national championship with Tufts University, and that was heartbreaking because we had poured our hearts and souls into every practice, every workout, and everything that gave us the best chance to win it all. It also meant that I wouldn't have another year with the brothers I had built such strong relationships with over those years. It was all very, very disappointing. It hurt deeply, and I just felt empty.

Two days later, I was supposed to play the individual tournament in both singles and doubles, and I felt dead inside. I felt completely burned out. I didn't want to be on court because I felt like there wasn't anything left that I was fighting for. In hindsight, that obviously wasn't true. There were still many things to strive for and compete for, but in my mind, I was simply out of it. I didn't want to play. I felt miserable on court, and there was no fire inside me. Unsurprisingly, I lost both matches in the first round and went back to Boston to pack my luggage.

Over the next couple of days, I felt pretty down overall and lacked motivation, but I knew I had to embrace the moment and find a way to let it pass so I could eventually get back to normal. That was a challenge because it had been a very emotional month for me—graduating, playing my last college matches, and having to say goodbye to all my friends. I gave myself time and made sure I continued working out so I wouldn't fall out of shape.

I think one of the lessons here is that there will be times when you're going to feel down. You'll feel burned out. You won't be motivated, and you'll need to find a way through it. Some days will be easier than others. Sometimes you have to push through, and you end up feeling much better after the practice, tournament, or match. Other times, though, everything becomes so overwhelming that you simply have to take a step back and give yourself time. Sometimes you even need to distract yourself by doing something that makes you happy—something that takes your mind away from tennis and everything related to it.

I guess that's my advice to myself and to whoever is reading this: recognize what type of moment you're facing. Is it just a lack of motivation for a practice? If so, you should probably find a way to push through and get the most out of it. But there are also moments when you're truly burned out, when you feel miserable and even begin to hate yourself while you're on court. That's the time to take a step back, breathe, relax, and maybe take a day or two off to clear your mind.

Know the difference between needing discipline and needing recovery. One will make you stronger, while the other will allow you to heal.

The important thing is to be honest with yourself. Learning to recognize which one you need is a skill in itself, and it's one that will serve you not only in tennis, but in every area of life.